Mariah Carey’s FAKE Marriage
In honor of Mariah Carey’s highly suspected FAKE marriage, our girl Jackie Beat put together this wonderful song, “Retouch My Body.” Sorry, Mariah ... don’t play games or society will hunt you down.
It’s really funny how none of Mariah Carey’s fan sites are reporting the “Fake marriage.” Interesting, huh?! Not, a single word. We’re betting this whole marriage thing is so NOT true. Mimi’s camp probablly got a hold of them telling them this was some type of a payback joke to make the headlines since the paparazzi cut her off for refusing to take off her sunglasses.
We won’t believe it until we see it on paper. Games...Games...Games.
It’s An Official Hoax? Mariah Carey Married Without a Pre-nup.
Oh, god, we’re freaking—it’s TRUE. The NY Post is also reporting that our beloved Mimo tied the knot with small screen wanna-be singer Nick Cannon, who we should also mention is 27 years old.
This is all so crazy. We don’t know what to say. Things just don’t seem right. We smell another meltdown on the horizon. We totally think she’s pregnant and got scared and had no choice but to marry. The condom broke or she was so messed up the “retard” forgot to use one.
Here’s comes Kevin and Britney Part II.
AND, did we fail to mention,“crazy" Mariah married this guyafter a month of dating and WITHOUT A pre-nup. Yup, NO PRENUP.
“There was no pre-nup - there wasn’t time,” says a worried source.
Kevin Part Two—Mariah is going crazy. Stay tuned! Somehow, we think its all 100% a publicity stunt, for Mariah’s sake we hope it is. Getting back at the paparrazzi—sweet.
A source who knows Mariah said, “The lady loves publicity. She’s also got a good sense of humor. If no one gets hurt, why wouldn’t she let the rumors swirl a little while longer and maybe help sales?”
Reps for Carey and Cannon did not respond to requests for comments.
Mariah Carey Marries Nick Cannon
Please tell us this is not true.
Latina magazine is reporting that Mariah Carey, 38, married wanna-be singer Nick Cannon, 27, in an impulsive, secret wedding ceremony yesterday on a remote island.
A “source” close to Cannon ratted the newlyweds out.
Source say Carey’s close friend, rapper DaBrat, was one of a few people to attend the quickie wedding.
We’re so guessing that Mariah is preganant and a divorce will be in the works in the near future. Touch My Jelly, throw me on the floor...file for divorce...I will haunt you down!
Let’s just pray she has twins so she can get all the fat out of her system. Nice way of getting married after only being together for a year.
Now let’s work on getting a better ring.
Mimo’s GMA F**kup
A sound techie at ABC’s Good Morning America probably got fired this morning after Mariah Carey’s back-up track completely f**ked up during her performance of “Touch My Body.” Touch my track and get fired. Luckily, Mimo could actually sing her way out of the nightmare unlike Ashlee Simpson who just gave up.
Things got better for the other two songs—we especially liked Mimi’s “I’m That Chick.” You like?
Mariah Needs Extra Help!
Mariah Carey needs a lot of help these days!!
Mariah Carey made her way to the CBS lot on Wednesday afternoon as the guest mentor on “American Idol.” And true to her rep, our girl was quite the diva.
Donning a (typical) tight-fitting outfit, Mariah worked the press area backstage — but it took a little longer than expected. Tech and camera guys apparently were made to put in the extra effort putting up lights and having them angled perfectly, with Carey’s people “double checking” that she was positioned perfectly at all times.
“We had to reshoot one of the questions,” one cameraman told Tarts. “I had to change the lighting and alter the position and do it again because we went off angle slightly. She has a director of photography with her at all times and can only be shot from the waist up.”
Well, when you are a multimillion-dollar music mogul, you do have a little authority in demanding your best angle, right?
However, Maz did lose quite a few fans on Thursday night when she decided to turn up two hours late to an album-signing at Universal City.
“She strolled in with sunglasses on when it was nighttime and by that point a lot of people got fed up and had left,” a photographer told Tarts. “It was ridiculous.”
CLICK HERE to read the original post. [FOX NEWS]
NEW MUSIC: Mariah Carey’s “I Feel It”
Mariah fans—here is an all-new, but all sounds the same bonus track off of Mariah’s new album E=MC2.
We don’t know what she’s feeling, but she claims to be feelin it in “I Feel It.”
We’re seriously starting to put two and two together and have come to the conclusion that Mariah Carey is really horny and needs dick fast. CLICK HERE to listen.
NEW MUSIC: Mariah Carey’s “ Heat” CLICK HERE to listen to a bonus track, “Heat" off of Mariah Carey’s upcoming album E=MC2, which drops on April 15th. Or, which can now be downloaded for FREE if you look hard enough anywhere on the internet. We had posted some links earlier in the week, but apparently, they keep taking them down. So keep checkin back!
EXCLUSIVE: Download Mariah Carey’s E=MC2 for FREE
Happy Mariah Monday!!
E=MC2 becomes a FREE giveaway thanks to the internet, as of today.
Apparently, Mariah Carey’s all-new album has been leaked via the internet a week before its April 15th release. Sucks to be Mariah’s book keeper - we predict more layoffs in the near future.
CLICK HERE to listen/download it for FREE lambs or we highly suggest you go to I-tunes to buy it.
We know that all of our precious News Gangsters will go out and support this artist—so we want everyone else to please, please buy, buy Mimi’s new album next week. We know you will. We know we will.
We’re so happy. Thanks Mimi! We hope you’re not mad?!
[Track List]
For the record, NewsGangster.com is solely linking to this site and has no involvment in actually receiving, uploading, or downloading this album.
NEW MUSIC: Mariah Carey’s “Migrate”
Mariah Carey fans, we have a treat.
Mimi’s new album, E=MC2, is scheduled to drop on April 15th—and most of you have already heard the #1 single “Touch My Body,” but here is an all-new track, ”Migrate,” in better quality.
We hate to admit it, but we kinda like it! We just weren’t into touching her body.
NEW MUSIC: Mariah Carey’s “That Chick”
We can’t get enough of our Mimi. Here she is performing a new song, , “That Chick,” off of her new album, “E=MC2,” slated for an April 15th release.
We like it because we’re trying to be nice. But, seriously, isn’t she a little to old to be singing about “I’ve gots flavor like ice cream.” Looks like the bitch stopped eating food and decided to start singing about it.
Mariah Inc.
Mariah ... Mariah ... Mariah—where do we begin, darling. Some people are dying to know:
First off, how much did you have to pay to get a photograph to look that great. Not to be mean, but we know that doesn’t look like you in real life. Great photo re-toucher though! We need a number. CLICK HERE here to see the masterpiece.
Secondly, we saw you perform at the Hills premiere party on MTV last night; what’s up with your voice?! Sick? Lastly, we really hope that you do succeed with your new album, E=MC2, but we’re disappointed with your latest single’s official remix. What is this?! Seriously.
We think you should stick to the ballads, the ballads love you. And, it would help if you stick to the classy outfits, just a reminder, you’re almost 40.
NEW MUSIC: Mariah Carey “Migrate”
Mariah Carey replaced the sick Janet Jackson on SNL this week by performing her two new singles, “Touch My Body” and “Migrate”
Too bad for her—it sucked hard-- let it Migrate and stick to touching her newly liposuctioned body Mimo.
Mariah Carey “Touch My Body” Video
One word - slut.
Enjoy lambs! She looks great!
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